INVISIBLE // FOR REMUS

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[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #3A4748 8px solid; border-right: #839175 2px dashed; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-left: 16px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] SHE WANTS TO GO HOME BUT NOBODY'S HOME THAT'S WHERE SHE LIES BROKEN INSIDE After Dorcas left the Great Hall, she immediately headed to Potions and Defense Against the Dark Arts classes. They dragged on painfully slow. That morning, she'd made plans with the gorgeous Remus Lupin to meet on the grounds in the afternoon after their classes. It was pretty much one of the best encounters they'd had, she thought, for the mere fact that she thought she got him thinking of her. All of the other times they hung out, she sort of laid low and just had general conversations with him - too afraid to let him in too closely since her crush on him had bloomed and exploded in her fifth year. Now she'd gained a bit of courage to actually try and get her point across to him, something she'd never done before. Maybe this was it, the day he'd finally realize how she felt about him. Well, maybe. It all sounded so grand in her head, but when it came to execution, Doe was pretty horrid. She dreamed of days where she'd just put her hands on either side of Remus' face and kiss him, hard, and walk away. Just so it wouldn't be a secret anymore. But when she saw him in the halls, she froze up and kept walking, maybe offering him a small smile or wave. She wasn't sure why Remus had such an effect on her, but she hated it. Maybe it would have been alright if she knew for a fact that he didn't like her, but everything just hung in the air and waved around with no clear direction. It sucked. But, maybe today. Maybe. After class, Doe immediately soared toward the grounds. She decided their meeting place to be the lake, which was a rather broad location actually. Now that she thought about it, she should have specified, but gazing into Remus' eyes made her thoughts go all jumbled. She gulped. What if he didn't show? Damn it. Dorcas immediately shut her doubts away and started walking around the lake to the pier, taking a seat at the end of it after slipping off her tan sandals. She sported a loose, tan and pink flowing tank top, with a white spaghetti strap shirt underneath, and paired with light-colored denim jeans. She set her shoes aside her - on the smaller side so Remus could sit on the other - and then looked out to the glimmering water. It was gorgeous. She looked down at her thighs and sighed, then laid down and closed her eyes. The brightness of the sun disturbed the darkness, but she didn't mind. Doe was sure she'd stick out to Remus when, and if, he came, so she simply laid there in peace, waiting. tag: REMUS words: --- template by eliza @ shadowplay

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Remus stared at his reflection in the dorm room mirror. He lifted the hair that often hung in his face and allowed it to flop back down. It settled untidily into its favorite place... all over. He sighed; he had attempted some semblance of order in his hair, but it didn't seem to want to cooperate with him. It was funny, the extent to which someone's body would work against them.

He prodded the jagged scars reaching across his face, as he had done so many times before. They weren't new wounds, but the stubborn things just wouldn't seem to fade. Remus tore himself away from the mirror, suddenly reminded of the afternoon stroll he had promised Doe. Exhausted as he was, he had planned to come upstairs and go to bed after his double Potions class. He was such a jerk! He wondered how long Doe might have been waiting.

With a flurry of black robes, Remus ran down the stairs in a clamor. He hurried out through the portrait and down the cascading rows of shifting stairs. A sudden gleam of sunlight forced his eyes into a squint. He searched the lawn until a familiar face met his eyes. He paused for a moment, gathering his nerve, until he confusedly asked himself what he was doing. Remus gathered himself and forced himself forward. He had not asked James or Sirius to come; though he didn't know why, the idea didn't appeal to him as much as it had when he lazily suggested in that morning.

"I'm so sorry," he apologized hastily to Doe once he was within earshot. He did not sit down beside her; rather, he waited for an invitation to do so. Should he just sit? She did ask him here. But he had been called over for a walk; wouldn't that defeat the purpose? Lost in conflicting thoughts, Remus stood there lamely, looking awkward.

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[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #3A4748 8px solid; border-right: #839175 2px dashed; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-left: 16px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] SHE WANTS TO GO HOME BUT NOBODY'S HOME THAT'S WHERE SHE LIES BROKEN INSIDE Doe laid there for what felt like eternity. But in all honesty, it was soothing and calming to her. Peaceful. Despite that it seemed that Remus wasn't going to show, Dorcas didn't think of it much. Besides, what more could there be for her to think on? If he didn't show up, it simply meant that he didn't like her. And if he did, well, maybe he was taking so long to try and make sure he looked his best...or whatever. She tossed the thoughts away and continued to reside in serenity until she heard the voice that she'd so desperately wanted to hear. "I'm so sorry." She opened her eyes, looking up at him from her laying position. A smile made its way across her features, widening the longer she looked at him. Dorcas sat up and then stood, slipping into her sandals. "It's completely fine," she assured him, nearing him. "I'm just glad you came at all," Doe said with a smile. She looked down at her toes and then looked back, meeting his eyes. Her heart fluttered. "Should we, erm, walk then? Since that was the reason we met, of course," she chuckled, not smiling completely but she could feel the dimples in her cheeks from the thin curve that traced her lips. Doe took notice of his messy hair and sleepy look. Maybe she should have just let him alone? Maybe he really hadn't wanted to come at all, since he seemed so tired. It would have been the nice thing to do to let him go on back to his common room to catch some sleep, but Doe really didn't want him to go. Not yet, anyway. tag: REMUS words: --- template by eliza @ shadowplay

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The day was absolutely gorgeous; it was perfect for a walk. The afternoon sun was high, throwing sparkling rays across the lake's shimmering surface. Students dotted the warm grass.

"I'm just glad you came at all."

Remus frowned slightly. She had clearly been there for a while. He hadn't meant to have kept her waiting for so long... he reminded himself of his definite jerk status. Came at all... Doe had begun to think that he wouldn't show. But she stayed. She waited for him.

At Dorcus's suggestion, Remus said nothing. He nodded his agreement and turned slightly, as if about to start walking away. No wait, you're a jerk, remember? Remus reminded himself. He thought searchingly for a remedy to this. He turned with a slight smile and held out his hand to help her up.

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[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #3A4748 8px solid; border-right: #839175 2px dashed; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-left: 16px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] SHE WANTS TO GO HOME BUT NOBODY'S HOME THAT'S WHERE SHE LIES BROKEN INSIDE Remus' silence was slightly uneasy. She felt that maybe he was bored with her or something. Her smile faded a little as she looked at him, watching him watching her. Dorcas wondered what lingered in his thoughts, but didn't want to push anything. Just as she was about to get up, he held out his hand to her and smiled. Doe grinned in return and took his hand in her own, resisting the urge to squeal as she felt his skin under hers. She gulped quietly before standing up, looking down at their hands. Dorcas took hers back casually - not too quickly as to not give the impression she didn't want to hold his hand - and then smiled. "Thanks," she said softly, before beginning to walk, sure he was right behind her. "Were your classes exciting at all today?" she asked, making conversation. Doe pushed a chunk of her hair behind her ear as to better look at him. Her sleek, brown locks often got in the way. But, she supposed she'd rather have longer hair than none at all. Plus, it was much more feminine. Thankfully, she remembered a clip she had in her pocket. Doe took it out as she waited for his answer, then pinned a few strands on her right side back and up, out of the way. She smiled at him again as she waited patiently for him to speak, wondering if he'd actually do so. The bags under his eyes insinuated that he really needed a rest. It wasn't like she wasn't up for a cuddle session...but that might have thoroughly scared him off, so she made no mention of her daydreams. But, she could still dream them! tag: REMUS words: --- template by eliza @ shadowplay

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Doe's hand lingered for a moment, clasped in his. She released it momentarily, and his own hand flopped back to his side after a faint pause. They walked slowly down the grassy lawn; they might as well have been standing still, as neither seemed keen on quickening their pace. People never seemed to go for walks to go for walks anymore. Then again, did people every study together to really study? There was something about company that rendered predesignated tasks strangely insignificant.

The conversation was stilled by a pregnant pause as Remus yawned. "Oh, well," he began to answer, considering the question. "As much as I love Potions class..." Remus had never excelled at potions. He spent half of his time in class re-reading instructions he had misinterpreted the first time and the other half actually working. He was usually a bright, hardworking student, so he wasn't used to the failed classwork.

Remus noticed Doe clipping back her hair. Immediately reminded of his own untamable locks, he brushed his back clumsily with his hand. "Is yours bothering you, too?" He asked jokingly.

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[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #3A4748 8px solid; border-right: #839175 2px dashed; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-left: 16px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] SHE WANTS TO GO HOME BUT NOBODY'S HOME THAT'S WHERE SHE LIES BROKEN INSIDE She couldn't help but chuckle at his mention of Potions. "Yea, I'm not too great at Potions either," Doe replied absently, really just trying not to make things awkward at that point. They seemed to be strolling rather slowly, which was exactly what she wanted. The slower their walk, the more time they could be together. And while it probably would have been more fun to actually do something, like fly around or play wizard's chess, Dorcas wasn't sure what Remus liked doing, and didn't want to put him off by suggesting they do something he didn't find tolerable. At least he found spending time with her as tolerable, right? Doe laughed lightly as he joked about their hair. "Only slightly," she replied, beaming. "Though, mainly because I don't think I did much with it today," Dorcas explained, blowing a tuft of hair from her vision as the wind blew it across her face again. She looked back at him and grinned. "So, as much as fun as this walk is, do you have any other ideas of what we could do? I mean...well...I sort of just mentioned a walk to be able to hang out with you..." she trailed, growing nervous and quieter as her words came to a halt. She bit her lip and felt her cheeks warm, sort of glancing between him and the ground as to not seem so awkward. Totally awkward. But totally worth every second. tag: REMUS words: --- template by eliza @ shadowplay

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((dunno if I got the right professor here))

Remus stopped walking for a moment. Something else? Something else like what? Hadn't she wanted to walk? He was terrible at thinking up things to do; that was usually Sirius' - or James' - job. He wasn't by any stretch of the imagination an "idea person," in fact, he was seldom asked for his opinion when it came to group activities. For most of Remus' young life, there was an apparent scarcity when it came to friends. He had grown up being content with just doing whatever his friends wanted to do, just happy to pal around with them. His opinion? Well he hadn't really developed one.

"Well..." Remus pondered, feeling terrible at the thought that he might be boring Dorcus with his company, "I heard a rumor that Kettleburn is keeping a Mngwa in the stables, we could go see if that's true... i guess." The idea sounded rather silly when put into words, so Remus paused again. Doe had just mentioned to him that the reason she'd called him here was to spend time with him. Certainly that must mean that she liked spending time with him, didn't it?

Could she be as worried about boring him as he was her?

He made up his mind. "Or, actually, I don't really mind what we do, I don't even mind if we don't do anything. It's not what you're doing that matters, it's the people you're with, isn't it?"

In a gesture supporting his previous statement, Remus laid back down on the grass and patted the soft earth next to him, motioning for Doe to lay down as well. He put his arms behind his head and stared at the clouds above, swimming in a sea of powdery blue.

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[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #3A4748 8px solid; border-right: #839175 2px dashed; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-left: 16px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] SHE WANTS TO GO HOME BUT NOBODY'S HOME THAT'S WHERE SHE LIES BROKEN INSIDE Doe listened to his suggestion and pondered it for a moment. But within that moment, Remus seemed to change his mind. Was he worried about boring her, too? She hoped not. She could never be bored around him, even if they were just laying around. Fortunately, that's what he decided to do. She watched him sit on the ground and pat the spot beside him. Dorcas couldn't help but grin at his gesture. "I don't mind doing nothing with you," she said softly before sitting beside him, laying down. Doe turned her head toward him and giggled. "That probably didn't come out right, but you know what I mean," she laughed before turning her gaze up at the sky. Doe set her right hand on her stomach and let her left hand linger at her side, blanketed by grass on all sides. She admired the view above...and beside her. Doe took a small gulp before looking at him again. "Have you er..ever been inside the Shrieking Shack?" she asked. She figured that her and Snape's little adventure could be conveyed to him, since it would be something interesting to talk about. But she'd be sure not to mention she was with Severus. After all, Remus was part of that 'Marauders' deal with James and Sirius, and they absolutely hated her new-found Slytherin friend. tag: REMUS words: --- template by eliza @ shadowplay

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Remus glanced over at Dorcas. She was staring straight ahead - up, in that case - looking completely content to just be there. Why weren't more people like that? He had to wonder. It was good to know that there were people out in the world who could just lay back and enjoy the clouds without having to be perpetually entertained. He snapped his head back up after realizing that he had been staring.

"Then we can do nothing together," Remus laughed slightly at her words. He plucked a small, white flower from the grass beside them and twirled it. It shivered delicately in the afternoon air, though the wind was as still as the sun overhead. Its light rays warmed the grass around them, which felt pleasant against his exposed arms.

"Have you ever been inside the Shrieking Shack?"

Remus did not answer for a moment, laying unnaturally still as his thoughts raced at mach ten. Was she hinting at something? Of course not, how could she even suspect...? "Have you?" He asked, sounding bewildered. He supposed that bewilderment was a natural response to being asked such a question; most students feared to enter the Shrieking Shack. He, of course, knew all too well the reason.

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[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #3A4748 8px solid; border-right: #839175 2px dashed; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-left: 16px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] SHE WANTS TO GO HOME BUT NOBODY'S HOME THAT'S WHERE SHE LIES BROKEN INSIDE Doe chuckled at his laughter. It was so nice to finally hear him enjoying himself. Dorcas assumed that the both of them were just worried about boring the other, hence his quiet nature. Though, Remus never was too loud, really. She found it interesting and mysterious. She was sure that once he got to be around her a bit more, he might open up as time went on. Even still, it didn't matter to her. Quiet or not quiet, it just meant they could balance each other out, should he choose to accept her giggly and fun side. She thought he would, though. There was nothing to insinuate he wouldn't. Remus seemed a bit worried when she mentioned the Shack. Did he really think it was haunted, too? She bit her lip. "Uh..yea, actually. This past weekend," Doe said softly, then raised her shirt to reveal her bruises, which were fading, and a few scabs from where the Whomping Willow scraped her. "Not that something in there did this to me, though. I found a tunnel that leads from the Shack to Hogwarts...and trust me, you do not want to go down there," Dorcas urged, turning back to the sky. tag: REMUS words: --- template by eliza @ shadowplay

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Remus' eyes explored the many cuts and bruises that adorned Doe's skin. He was quietly aware of his heart pounding underneath the fabric of his shirt. He knew all too well what must have banged her up so badly; the vicious guardian of the passageway into the shack.

"The whomping willow," Remus muttered. He cleared his throat abruptly. Idiot, he chastised himself. Maybe she would ignore this quiet outburst.

"What in the world compelled you to visit that dreadful place?" He asked her, staring intently. Remus didn't answer her previous question.

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[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #3A4748 8px solid; border-right: #839175 2px dashed; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-left: 16px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] SHE WANTS TO GO HOME BUT NOBODY'S HOME THAT'S WHERE SHE LIES BROKEN INSIDE She took notice that he knew the Willow was what caused her injuries. Surely he only knew this from obvious fact and not from personal experience. At least, she hoped not. She cared too much for him to think that Remus would go off wandering down that trail. Not only was the passage creepy, but it was deadly, too. Dorcas looked to him and sighed. "Curiosity," she said softly, her eyes gazed into his. "I was in the Shack - pure fun, I suppose - and we found the basement that led to the passage there," Doe explained, then looked down at his hand, wondering how it'd feel against hers again. She blushed at the thought and looked back up to him, lowering her shirt and setting her hand over it again. It hurt a bit at the touch, but eventually eased. tag: REMUS words: --- template by eliza @ shadowplay

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Remus twirled the flower between his fingertips. His lip was still downturned in a thoughtful frown. He always felt awkward whenever someone brought up the Shrieking Shack. What was he supposed to say? Should he pretend he wasn't even the least bit interested? He was Head Boy; should he scold her for breaking the rules? Somehow, he couldn't imagine doing so; he didn't have the heart. But still... he couldn't shake the disturbing image of Dorcus making her way down, one lonely night, to the Shrieking Shack, her curiosity having overcome her, and coming face to face with... with...

The flower fell absently from his hand. He looked away from her and out at the lake, shimmering innocently. His fingers made their way to his face automatically, rubbing at his scars as he often did without thinking. "We?" Remus mused. "Who was with you?"

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[atrb=border, 0, true][atrb=style, border-left: #3A4748 8px solid; border-right: #839175 2px dashed; background: #d8d8d8; padding-top: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-left: 16px; padding-bottom: 12px; -moz-border-radius: 10px; width: 368px;] SHE WANTS TO GO HOME BUT NOBODY'S HOME THAT'S WHERE SHE LIES BROKEN INSIDE Dorcas made an attempt to not notice his silence. He seemed worried, or maybe just bored? He definitely seemed like something was bothering him, and Doe simply hoped it wasn't her. But how could it not be? He was all fine and dandy before she mentioned the Shack, and now he was...different. She sighed. When he asked for her company, she frowned. Dorcas closed her eyes and bit her lip. "Well...uh, I know you don't like him," she said softly, then sat up and looked over at him. "But we got along fine..and I hope you don't think I'd ever do something bad for befriending him..." she said, scared that he'd actually unfriend her just because she was wandering about a deserted tunnel with a Slytherin. She sighed again. "Severus Snape," Dorcas said, laying back down, though on her side to face him. As she watched him stroke his scars on his face, she wanted to do the same. To let her fingers travel across his skin and tell him how beautiful he was, despite what he considered flaws. Doe thought everything about him was perfect, even though he obviously did not. Maybe others hadn't noticed Remus' frown that he sported everytime he stroked his cheeks, but it wasn't hard for her - a girl who liked to watch him from afar - to realize his dislike for himself. Who should anyone be to judge him for a scar, when Doe would have killed to have the scar of his love on her heart - permanent, visible, and yet soothing to know it existed. tag: REMUS words: --- template by eliza @ shadowplay